Remember, I Just Link To 'Em

Post-modern performance art. You couldn't make this shit up.

If anybody needs me, just bang on the hatch door with a brick.

I Hates Me An Obama, I Does

Bloody hell I'm angry. Look at some of the tee shirts that son of a bitch wears, right in plain view, in front of the cameras. That's some astonishing arrogance right there. It's like the president doesn't even care about keeping up appearances any more, now that he's not up for re-election. That's how blatant and in your face the new world order has become.

I move that we impeach this travesty of an asshole as soon as congress reconvenes.

Monophasic Sleep Is Bullshit For Australopithecines

It reduces our sex drive. It lowers our happiness index. It shoehorns us into a 9 to 5 lifestyle to which our merrymaking demeanour is not accustomed. 
It's all about conformity n' sheet. The man's always trying to put us into a box. It won't do.

A magical race of people, the scientific name for the Australopithecus means "pure sunshine", "he who likes to take things at his own pace", and "that man over there, your honour".
The most diabolical act of genocide that the Piltdown Man ever cooked up was the 40 hour working week. Having to get up and do stuff really cramps our style. It threatens our time-honoured cultural traditions.

Whilst our boring Neanderthal cousins haven't been able to get on top of this situation over the last 30,000 years, the cleverer 'pithecines like myself are all over this one.

We just snooze at work.

"Stop dozing off at the monitor! You almost got hundreds of passengers killed! I'm docking your annual leave!"
- the curse of the Department Head

Rap Died 17 Years Ago

Respect for my nigger, Biggie Smalls. Gone too soon.

1.6 Thousand Hits on Fault-Co

That's a lot of hits for some obscure website run by a ruggedly handsome individual with a keen intellect and a horde of admirers.

The content never grows old, per se. There are only "classics" and exciting new arrivals.

The site was set up for three reasons in 2011:

1. Profit.
2. To inform and to entertain.
3. To give Cleve Blakemore the shits.

That's it. Now that I'd say we've achieved those objectives we set out with, I am like Arnold Schwarzenegger at the end of the second Terminator flick, with no further reason to exist. If anybody needs me I'll be shaving my head and setting myself alight on the steps of Old Parliament House at about noon tomorrow. Bring some marshmallows.

Astonishing Real World Averaging Yields Archetypes

I've been saying this for 27 years. Given that I'm in my early thirties now, my earlier statements may not have been the most articulate. But I was still thinking it. As ever, mainstream science is only just starting to catch up.

You can glean a great deal of information about a person just from the layout of their face, the firmness of their handshake, their browsing history and a couple of bank statements. I always make use of these factors to size someone up before entering into any kind of a contract or discourse with them. My distant central-African relatives were a little harder to phrenotype in this manner since we could only communicate via email, but sometimes the benefits of handing over your bank details can far outweigh the disadvantages of skipping the initial face-to-face interaction. Besides, if you can't trust the Prince of Nigeria then who the hell can you trust these days?

P.S. Notice how the indie game developer just comes across as naturally superior? That's because he takes Vitamin D and doesn't mess around with Unity code, preferring to just get the job done with Clickteam's Fusion 2.5, which is the last word in rapid application development for small game developers.

P.P.S. Actually it's more cost effective to just outsource an entire project to Pakistan these days, which has the added bonus of actually seeing the project through to completion some time before the second coming of Christ.

P.P.P.S. As Michael Gerber points out, at some point you need to step away from being the Technician so that your hands are free to be the Entrepreneur. This can be especially hard to do when your business or project is a creative endeavour, and it's the reason why I usually reach the 90% completion mark before either embarking on the next project I've dreamt up, or getting mired in the endless spiral of perfectionism.

P.P.P.P.S. Apparently the postscript is the second most read piece of an article after the title, which means you've been doing some hefty work by now and your eyes need a rest. So here is a picture from canonclast.com of an 18 year old woman playing beach volleyball. If you feel any kind of a physiological response then you can give yourself a big red tick, because your iron levels are looking good and your endocrine system is showing normal activity. Come back for another checkup in a year's time.

P.P.P.P.P.S. This blog might even have another post on it, by then.